Stir Crazy

I have been neglecting this little blog thing here.  But for good reason. 

God has moved something awful crazy in my heart.  My family thinks I need help. 

I am not a reader.  I rarely take the time to read anything, and sadly even reading the Bible had become blah.  (horribly sad to admit because of my deep love for Jesus). 

One of the more influential women in my life (Jen Hatmaker) wrote a couple of books.  And I had to read them because I love her and trust her. 

Well then that led to me finishing a book in 3 days which is UNHEARD of for me.  I usually get the the very end and then quit.  Wha?

So from June-now I have not been able to stop the constant reading.  She mentioned several books and other friends did too.  I am hungry again for words from Jesus, even if it takes these authors hitting me over the head with the reality that I have been ignoring some pretty big things. 

Here they are.  If you are needing a good read and are ready for something serious to happen in your heart, you cannot miss these. 

Radical- David Platt
Crazy Love-Francis Chan
Kisses from Katie-Katie Davis
Interrupted-Jen Hatmaker
7- Jen Hatmaker

I cannot think straight I am so conflicted with our life in America and the needs of those around us.  How did I become so comfortable with this?  How did I not see so many suffering and truly believe they are my responsibility?  How did I miss that in the Bible? 

I am ashamed.  I am disgusted.  I am achy.  I am stir crazy for wanting to DO SOMETHING.  And poor Blake has known all along that I am odd, but now I want to be really weird and actually do what Jesus asked us to do...lay down my life for Him. 

In the midst of all of this wrestling in my heart, we have gone full force into the foster care ministry with our new church.  We are floored by the needs in our community and state.  So two weekends ago we brought home 2 kids from the shelter for 3 nights over Labor Day weekend.  Our church got involved with DHS in a program called Home for the Holidays.  The idea is for faith families to become certified (approved?) to take children from the shelter for a holiday weekend.  We were honored to join 13 other families from our church in taking home 17 kiddos! 

It was such a great experience.  Don't get me wrong...it's wasn't convenient (we already have 4 lovies).  It wasn't comfortable.  It wasn't easy.  But hello believers...God never told us life would be any of those.  He kept whispering to me all weekend when I would get discouraged, "Life is not supposed to be comfortable sweets."  How have I let myself believe these lies for so long? 

As we drove the kids back to the shelter I was sick to my stomach.  Every child begged to not go back.  Not for lack of love, cleanliness and care there, but it's a shelter for heaven's sake!!!!  Kids belong in families.  And I didn't have any good reason why the kids couldn't stay (besides we needed more training to be certified).  I have room.  I have Jesus.  This weekend just felt like a band-aide for this gaping wound that was in my city.  The reality hit me that why do I not think that these children are just as much my children as the ones God has already blessed me with.  Didn't He say they are all His?  None of them are really "ours".




Please watch this amazing video.  Pray with me about what God has already asked us to do.  God doesn't call us...He already commanded us to do this.  When we give our hearts to Jesus, then we must do as He commands. 

Consider reading these books.  I beg it of my brothers and sisters. 

Back to new!

So, we've been home for a couple of days and are getting back on schedule.


I've so enjoyed trying out the "5 Love Languages" on the kids, and whoa. This is AWESOME! We are not back to "normal" but have a new style at home! Even discipline can be wonderful!


There are so many things that I've learned that are easy to do, I was just rushing myself through discipline and not planning it out and therefore making some rather big mistakes.


For example, my Owen loves quality time (what child doesn't?), so he asks for it lots. As you can imagine there are times he misbehaves because he is needing my attention, and when I discipline him for his poor choice, I put him in time out in his room. This devastates him and is not necessary for the "crime". For him, a simple positive guidance (kindly reminding him of the rules) would work and maybe some thinking time in a chair (but not isolation). It's simple stuff, and makes lots of sense, and it's made a world of difference!!!


Our little Sadie bug gets OH-SO annoyed being in her car seat. She can't even last 15 minutes anymore. I have come to find that it might just be she loves physical touch. She wants to be in my lap! So when she starts her hollering in the car, I've started just touching her leg or holding her hand. Yes, this is a bit of a challenge in the car, but it's TONS better than hearing loss! And I am telling you that nothing else has worked!


One thing the book is quick to point out is that all children need all 5 types of love, but typically one speaks louder to them at different points in their life. I am just sad I didn't read this earlier!


So I found my cord to the camera and downloaded our pics. I found this city to be so relaxing. Blake and I could not be more blessed than to have been given the opportunity to go! He is now officially finished with interviews and we can't wait to see where God takes us next year! We will be truly blessed to be at any of these programs.

I am not sure how anyone could not believe in God when seeing this!!!

It was beautiful weather this day, nearly 50 degrees while we were walking on the snow covered beach!

A guy offered to take a picture of us! How cool! Poor Blake had to put up with all of my pictures since the kids weren't there!

Taken by the timer! These rocks were incredible. We drove to this area and climbed and walked a bit to get closer to the water.

Then its started snowing! It could not have been any more perfect!

Can you see the water back through the trees?

Another one by the timer! Sorry again Blake!

I have to get running! We went on a play date this morning with some good friends, and this afternoon are meeting Momma G (Sadie's birth mom) for a date! We haven't seen her in so long and are so excited to squeeze on her!

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Adoption update: we now have our background checks, abuse and neglect checks running (our fingerprints are still good for another 4 years) and our pastor letter of reference in. We are waiting to receive our second application forms in the mail!

Trans-racial parenting workshop

We finally got a picture of Sadie and Turner together! They allowed kids 6 months and younger to attend.

As you can see, Sadie couldn't take her eyes off this handsome little guy! They are about 5 weeks apart...isn't that right Chassidy?

I want to share how much we loved the workshop yesterday, but in saying that I did leave there with a heavy heart.

I was so glad the morning ended with hair care because it lifted the mood for me!

Boy did we learn a TON of new stuff about hair care! The stylist that came and talked to us was excellent. She answered so many questions for us and I know saved me from buying some silly stuff for my kids' hair.

I wish I could sit down and write out everything that was covered about hair, but I couldn't possibly.

The things I loved the best were that just like all white hair is different and we can't use the same products...so is African American hair. There's really not one product that will fit all hair types! Makes me feel better about trying 100 different products on the boys! She also answered questions about swimming and shampooing...I could go on and on!

So, I went to the store and bought some satin wraps for the boys to sleep in. We'll see if they actually keep them on, but they loved the idea that DeMarco Murray and Gerald McCoy might just wear the same caps to sleep in!
Please don't worry, I am not going to put this on her to sleep in! The boys just wanted her to try it on!

So, if you need a good stylist, here you go! Get this, she is a multi-racial stylist and has worked on just about every kind of hair! Her name is Shiron Bullock at Evolution Salon (walk-ins are welcome)! Let me know if you want her contact info and I'd be glad to share!

The "heavy" part of the morning was the reality that there still is a lot of racism that goes on today.

It's not something that we have had to face, and something that Blake and I are blessed that our families never had issues with (I mean no one is racist).

So it's so hard to hear that parents still teach their kids ugly things about skin color, as if it's anything more than just skin.

Blake and I desperately want to be prepared for when our children are met with hatred about race.

We want to teach them, as we would with any other obstacle, to cling to their relationship with Christ. We do not want to live our lives in fear of racism, or always looking out for it, like we're on guard.

But we do want to understand that it is hard for our kids being raised by parents who don't look the same.

Honestly, it's a real struggle on how to balance these two things... We want them to have relationships with others that look like them, but we also want them to understand that looks are not WHO THEY ARE.

We are Christians and we want our family to be identified by and in Christ alone.

Hearing stories yesterday about how racism is hitting these children made me sick to my stomach just thinking of O, Cooper or Sis having to deal with it. But it also brought to mind a story that I hide in my mind and heart because it's incredibly embarrassing.

I want to share because it's true.

I want to share it because it helps to remind me of the reality of kids and humans.

I want to share because I came from a very loving, graceful, Christ-centered home.

So here goes...

I told a girl on the bus one day that she couldn't come to my birthday party because she was Jewish and didn't love my God! Yep, sure did. I was probably 5 or 6.

I went home and I guess told my mom, who was horrified (do you remember this mom?)!

Let me tell you that my parents have NEVER uttered a negative word about anyone of differing beliefs or race and certainly would not have spoken of leaving them out of something.

I have no idea where this came from besides I knew that I wanted everyone to love my God and perhaps this would convince her? I think I didn't quite understand God's message of "out of LOVE" at this point!

My mom immediately drove me to this poor girl's home and I apologized and invited her to my party. It was no surprise that she didn't join us.

It makes me want to die thinking of that and how I made her feel. I can't imagine what her mom felt or what she told her mom and what they thought about my family and Christians as a whole!

I am sharing because I know our kids' hearts can be broken for a million reasons...

I grew up worrying that people would make fun of me for my diabetes.

Some did. And it hurt and I cried.

I was made fun of for being a Christian and was called a Bible-banger.

Wonder if that girl on the bus started that one?

I was dorky, not really too cute and was awkward around guys.

I know I made fun of people as a child and I know I hurt people's feelings.

My point is that this is just life...being judged and left out at times.

I want my focus in parenting to be about accepting others and loving others because WE ALL ARE DIFFERENT! Hatred and judgement exist in so many other areas outside of race!

We all are different and we all are THE SAME!

We all were made in God's image.

We all should be here striving to be like HIM and to love like Him.

I don't want to start making life about race.

My life has never been that way. Never did my parents talk about being white or Caucasian.

I know that because we are raising kids that are of different race, we have to do things differently.

And we are. But how far do we go?

I know that because I am white, I haven't experienced race issues like some have...but I have none-the-less experienced being judged because of my skin.

But, I think there's a fine line of where we make it a bigger deal than it needs to be, just in trying to prove it's not an issue.

I want to always spend more time talking with my kids about Christ and being like Christ.

So, all ye readers...please share with me.

Give me your insight in LOVE (I am not afraid to delete your comment if it is hateful!).

Teach me how you handle these things with your kids!

I don't like begging for comments, but guys...my heart was so heavy leaving yesterday wondering how we were going to take on this race battle.

I don't want to have my head buried in the sand here...so I am asking you to share.

If you have adopted trans-racially, have a trans-racial family, are a minority or have experienced racism...I beg you to help me know what to do here!

If you are a friend or family and just want to give wisdom or insight...please do! You know I am a words girl and I need some guidance here.

How do you handle this without causing more segregation or actually making race a big deal?

I hear God whispering to me to keep my eyes on Him and He will guide us as always.

I am ending with Cooper's favorite song right now...

Jesus loves the little children,

All the children of the world.

Red and yellow,

Black, brown, white.

They are precious in his sight!

Jesus loves the little children of the world!