"So promise me you'll never forget...that you aren't an accident or an incident...you are a gift to the world, a divine work of art, signed by God. You were deliberately planned, specifically gifted, and lovingly positioned on this earth...Flooded by emotion, overcome by pride, the Starmaker turns to us, one by one, and says, 'You are my child. I love you dearly.'" Max Lucado, God Thinks You're Wonderful

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Honoring Birth Moms

We had the pleasure of seeing Sadie's birth mom this past Saturday.

It was just perfect.

The weather was nice enough that we could meet her at a park and let the boys run around while we caught up with Momma G. It's always a challenge to try and entertain the boys so that we can really have quality time with Momma G and for her to have that special time with Sadie. So, just the fact that we could be outside was a huge blessing.

Sadie was in a great mood (when is she not?). She was wide awake, which she had not been at our last visits with Momma G. She was all smiles, you know...her huge, all face smile. It made Momma G so happy to see her so happy.
She was blowing bubbles (spitting) at Momma G, so she got totally soaked. She said the sweetest thing when Sadie covered her in slobber. She said, "I have been waiting a long time to have your slobber all over me little Skielar."

It hit me hard yet again how birth moms have thoughts and dreams of interacting with their children. They long to be covered in their spit and spit up. They would love to change just one more diaper. These thoughts happen hourly I imagine. I am sure as time and years pass, it's not as often, but I know there is not a day that goes by that they don't long to see their "baby".

This is why I LOVE adoption. It makes me a better mom.
Everytime I have to change clothes because I am soaked with puke, or that my toddler throws an all out tantrum, I remind myself that there is a mom out there that only wishes she could live this life.
But she chose me.
She chose for me to be her child's mommy. She chose for me to kiss skinned knees and wipe away tears and talk through frustrations. I am a better mom because of these birth moms.

Last year, our agency held a special retreat for birth moms over Mother's Day weekend. What a ministry they have!
Can you imagine being a birth mother on Mother's Day? Can you imagine the day going by without being told "Happy Mother's Day" by your child? Can you imagine being a mommy that has chosen to give her child the gift of a family, and then dealing with that loss and grief again on Mother's Day?

It breaks my heart to think of all of the birth moms out there that are not celebrated on this day.

So, last year we worked with the agency to honor birth moms on this hard weekend. They arranged the whole event, and we gathered gifts for these women. Several of you were such a big help last year, and I am hoping that some of you might want to help in some way this year.

If you have any ideas of what we could do, we would love to hear them. Last year we put together gift baskets for each girl. For the girls that spent the night, they got pj's and matching slippers. We just really wanted to make them feel special, pampered, loved and honored. And, you know what...they loved it!

So, if you want to help...please comment and let me know your thoughts. We could use small gift cards for movie tickets, Sonic and such. I think we are going to do gift baskets again (unless we have any other cool ideas). So money would also be appreciated. Last year we also included notes to the birth moms just sharing our love, prayers, appreciation and respect to all of them. So even if you can only send a letter, that is HUGE!
If you comment or email me @ mollykshockley@hotmail.com , I will send you a stamped envelope in the mail so that it will make it easier on you. If you want, you can send stuff directly to the agency and get yourself a nice tax deduction! Their info is linked on the right of the blog.
Love you all and thanks for helping us to love on these incredible women. Thank you for helping us show them that we never forget the sacrifice they have made.


Norma said...

You just have a way of saying things, Molly! Once again I have tears down my face... YES, we will help love on these Mommas!! Just let us know what you want to do and what you need! We are in!... Love, Mom and Dad

tim, ally and silas said...

molly, i love the way you express this! thank you for sharing your heart and your life! we would love to support these moms - you can send an envelope (stateside) to 6106 E. 93rd St, Tulsa, OK 74137 and my parents will get it and i can give them further instruction from there. thanks for letting us be involved ~
love, ally (and tim and silas)

Kristy said...

Love it!!! Love to help and made me think to do something special for our birthmom even though our situation is different she still gave birth and life to our amazing son.

Courtney Connelly said...

THANK YOU for your post! Your words are always so encouraging and today they have made me a better mother. I will be sending you 'stuff' to include in the gift baskets for these amazing mothers as you all honor them! I know your address, no need to send me an envelope! :)
Love ya,

Becki Francy said...

Absolutely Beautiful.....tears streaming down my face. I love Mommy G and Mommy M.....they have given us the most incredible gift every.... I can't imagine the sacrifice they have made to give us such great joy. I love them so much for what they have done.

Laura said...

Count me in sister! I will talk to you and find out what is needed most.

Thank you for reminding me to cherish each and every moment as a mother!

Love you so much!!!

Fether said...

Count me in again!! Love this post. It makes my rough days w/ my kiddos seem so petty. I love the pic of Sadie w/ Momma G...precious!

Sweet Patience said...

That is so awesome that you are holding on to your promise by allowing Sadie's birthmother to have contact and experience her growing. She is blessed to have you all committed.