Simma Down

Did you ever see that SNL skit Simma Down Now? 

I feel like I need to settle down from all this wrestling going on in my heart.  It's intense in there.  And honestly, it's painful.  I don't want to hurt like this.  I feel actual physical ache in my heart for the facts that I have read about poverty, starvation, and the blind eye I have turned to this.  And then I remember that allowing a return of comfort would only be going back to where I was.  There is a reason God has stirred my heart.  I need to make changes.  To only feel guilty about this culture and go on with life is useless.  And to only speak about it, or the books, and change nothing is also sinful.  It is now blatantly obvious to me God has called us to something different. 

I am desperate for Jesus to work through me.  To use all of me.  And I am sad to say I have always held parts of me from Him.  Several of these books opened my eyes to that fact.  And in that truth, it brought me freedom that I have never felt to actually give Him every part of myself...just like He asked.  I have begun to really grab hold of the fact that this IS my responsibility.  The fact that 26,000 children die from starvation or preventable disease everyday makes my stomach turn.  It's horrific. 

"So when you and I hear staggering numbers and statistics about the poor and needy around us and around the world, we have a choice.  We can switch the channels on our mega-TVs and continue our comfortable, untroubled, ordinary, churchgoing lives as if the global poor don't exist.  We can let these numbers remain cold, distant, and almost imaginary.  Or we can open our eyes and our lives to the realities that surround us and begin considering the faces that are represented by these numbers....We can stand with the starving or with the overfed.  We can embrace Jesus while we give away our wealth, or we can walk away from Jesus while we hoard our wealth." David Platt, Radical

God just keeps speaking so clearly to me that I have become way too comfortable in my life.  That I can give Him all of me and I can completely trust my children, my marriage and my heart to Him. 

 Singing and dancing "If You're Happy and You Know It!"  She LOVES to sing!!

 Sister couldn't go to sleep one night and she got to snuggle with daddy and watch football.  Shhhh, don't tell her bigs!

 Happy 7th birthday OWEN!!!

 Story time before bed...they are so sweet to always smile for the camera!  This too shall pass!

 Happy 4th birthday Sadie!  She chose the Hello Kitty donut!

 That sweet chocolate skin doesn't hide any goodies we eat!  She loved the flower donut though ;)

So what does that change look like?  How does that unfold for each of us?  Certainly it will be different for all of us, so I won't stand up here like a dingbat and say we all need to do this or that. 

It's frustrating to see that we save, hoard and bicker about how much is enough to give when we know that people are dying every minute around the world. Jen Hatmaker's book 7 helped me to see how easily global hunger could be eliminated if we cared more about this than dog food, or perfume. Seriously!?!? We spend more on those than ending hunger.

I am excited to see all that is to come for us.  I am amazed that I feel acutely aware now about what true needs are and all that we live with that our culture says is a need.  It's embarrassing really.  God has called us to store up our treasures in heaven, not on earth...this is a battle, a war to not get caught up in the current.  Deep breath...  Is this the narrow road He meant?   I think so sister.